One-stop Shopping

Need a hammer, two pillows, a toaster, and a gallon of milk?

Target.

Beautiful. It's like one-stop shopping. Some people would go to four stores to get those things.

That's how I'm starting to feel about the ER. Need a blood sample, urine sample, x-ray, ultrasound, and intravenous medicines?

I did. Monday Morning.

Emergency room.

Beautiful. It's like one-stop shopping. Some people would go all over the hospital to get those things.

Plus the hours are great. You don't have to schedule an appointment in advance. And, similar to the gym, if you go at certain hours (like 3am) there is a lot of availability and not a lot of distractions. It only costs me $35 too. (which is $35 more than my regular doctor co-pay.) However, if you consider the convenience and benefits I think $35 is a bargain.

I landed in Sacramento Sunday night at 6:30pm. At the Dallas airport I enjoyed a meaty burger with fries from TGIF. Also, I had a small snack on the plane. By the time I was home I wasn't that hungry. About 8:30pm I decided instead of having an actual dinner I would just fry up a couple eggs before bed. Two fried eggs with salt and pepper. That's it. That's all I ate. Within 30 minutes I had bad stomach pains. I managed to fall asleep before ten, but when I woke up at 12:30 the pains were still there. Sharp. Constant. I called the advice nurse and described the situation. She asked if I had anyone that could drive me to the emergency room. Not really. It's 12:30. Then she said she wanted to talk a doctor and get back to me. After consulting one of the docs in ER she came back and said because I wasn't throwing-up, or having diarrhea, or other symptoms I didn't need to come in. Just take some Tums and Tylenol.

I wish I was throwing up or having diarrhea. Then I at least would know my body was doing something about it. Instead, I was just in pain. Sharp. Constant.

Tylenol and Tums. I dug through the medicine cabinet, but found neither. Drove to Safeway. At 1am. As I'm buying only two things: Tyenol and Tums, the cashier scans my items and politely asks, "How are you doing tonight?" Several possible responses enter my mind.

"Could be better," was my response.

That was the truth. For some reason I didn't think those drugs would help. I didn't feel upset to my stomach. This was different. I had packed a backpack for the ER even before the trip to Safeway. Finally, around 3am I caved and drove the emergency room.

I got my own room this time. Room 11. The doctor asked me some questions. One of them involved ulcers. That sounded like a good lead. I asked him if that was what he was thinking. He said he was thinking about 28 different things. He didn't elaborate on the other 27.

Later I was rolled to x-rays. This was a new ER treatment for me. I felt pretty special being pushed through the hall. At least until I heard them talking about me.
"Take room 11 to x-rays."
Then upon arrival, "Room 11. Here for x-rays."
The x-ray lady said, "You Kevin?"
"Yes, but room 11 is fine. That's what they're calling me now."

They pushed me back to my room. Nobody ever mentioned the results of my stomach x-rays. Later the doctor came back with an ultrasound machine. He rolled it on my stomach. He even let me see the picture.

I have gallstones. Lots of them.

He made an appointment for me to see the surgeon, and gave me some drugs to take until then. Told me to eat a low-fat diet. Stay away from things like milk, foods that are high in fat, and fried eggs.

I asked him for a drug to help me sleep. He said he would get me something. I was thinking for right now, but he thought I meant to take home. I'm very thankful for the misunderstanding.

After some commotion it was agreed I wouldn't drive home (I believe it was just after 5am) until I took a nap. I slept until about the time half of Sacramento showed up (around 8am). A few of the loudest residents were assigned to room 12.

When I woke at 8am I unhooked several things from my body. Two on my chest, one on my stomach, and one on my finger. Once free from the chords I walked down the hall to use the bathroom. Came back to room 11 and got dressed and ready to go.

I asked the nurse some dietary questions, and she came back with a paper saying stuff I should and should not eat. She checked my vitals and said I could go. I asked where to pay and she directed me to lady at the desk in the middle.

I paid. $35.